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<blockquote data-quote="Saysay" data-source="post: 733928" data-attributes="member: 977"><p>Haha ace teece! <img src="/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/classics/king.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":king:" title="azking :king:" data-shortname=":king:" /></p><p></p><p>Just found this on the webby...</p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.</span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(The shoplifter special!)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(and that would be how?)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Do not turn upside down.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Too late! you lose!)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Product will be hot after heating.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On packaging for a Rowenta iron:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Do not iron clothes on body.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(But wouldn't that save more time?)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Whose body?)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On Boot's Children's cough medicine:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Do not drive car or operate machinery.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On Nytol sleep aid:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Warning: may cause drowsiness.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(One would hope!)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a Korean kitchen knife:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Warning: keep out of children.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a string of Christmas lights:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">For indoor or outdoor use only.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(As opposed to use in outer space.)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a food processor:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Not to be used for the other use.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Now I'm curious.)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On Sainsbury's peanuts:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Warning: contains nuts.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(but no peas?)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On an American Airlines packet of nuts:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a Swedish chainsaw:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">On a child's Superman costume:</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.</span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black"></span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Arial'"><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: Black">(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)</span></span></span></p><p></p><p><img src="/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/classics/axe.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":axe:" title="axe :axe:" data-shortname=":axe:" /> Brilliant! <img src="/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/classics/axe.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":axe:" title="axe :axe:" data-shortname=":axe:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Saysay, post: 733928, member: 977"] Haha ace teece! :king: Just found this on the webby... [FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black] (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](The shoplifter special!) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](and that would be how?) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](But it's 'just' a suggestion!) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](Too late! you lose!) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](Are you sure? Let's experiment.) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](But wouldn't that save more time?) (Whose body?) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](One would hope!) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](As opposed to use in outer space.) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](Now I'm curious.) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](but no peas?) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](Raise your hand if you've tried this...) [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black]On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=Black](Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] :axe: Brilliant! :axe: [/QUOTE]
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